Sunday, August 16, 2009
Home sweet hemo
your'l have to excuse my typing readerxs I#m a little but drunk. I've been celebrating about a momentous moment in the lief of Barry Newsdesk ewsq, that's yours truly!!!!!!!!!
Yes, you've probably spotted why we're celebrating. Whhile I was flying back to blighty after what can onlt be described to be a pretty cool and successful business trip to LA, the blogosphere pushed my hits to over 2000.
THey said it wouldn't amount to anytihg, well, Gill said it wuldn't anyway, who's laughing nwo???? Eh GILL, whos laughing now??
I was alerady in pretty positive mood after single handedly getting my leg over some of the hottest crumpet in Hollywood, they the flight back in Virgin upper class was absolutely cool too, flat beds and bedside booze deliervy. THANK YOU Mr BRANDON.
I like to think that I'm a bit like Richard Branson, he knows how to run the shop, I've got an entrepreneurial bent myself, you've only got to look at this blog and my successful career in meduia sales to see that I, Barry Newsdesk, am bloody well going places.
i GOT BACK TO THE FLAT AND dAN HAD GOT IT LOOKING REALLY NIC E, oops Caps Lock is a nightmare isn't it? I mean, what is the point of Caps Lock? I have never had recourse to botrher using is, yet it sits there on the ket board taking up prime real estate right next to the Shift key. I should probably change my SHift key options and start using the one o nthe right habnd, but you can't teach an old dog new tricks.
Where was I? Ah yes, I got back to the flat and Dan had got the place lookign really nice. He'd tidied it right up and even had some tea on the go.
I should probably explain something, while i was away I had a communication with Dan, he was at his absolutel wit's end looking for somewhere to stay, so I suggested he could have the spare room at my place, it's been doubling up as my study, but I suggesyedf he get himself a bed frmo Ikea and move in.
I know it's sudden isn't it. but I was thinking about my finances and now Mum's not paying the mortegage for me, I needed to think outside the box. I'm charging Dan a veritrable bargain. AND because I'm on a tracker mortgage, he's pretty much covering the entire thing.
WHAT A BEAUTY eh? I'm living pratically rent free ,and my lodger doubles up as a cleaner, and he's my bloody boss to boot - so I'm well up on the brownie points there.
We split an 12 pack of Cobra earlier sitting in Clapham Common (they've got a new one with ginger in, it's a bit pricey, but it;s fucking lovely), I didnt tell him I was celebrating the blog's achievements, I don't think Dan really knows what Blogs are really, he's not the creative type, although he's ver ygood with colour, he is always impecably turned out.
I'd best slow down, got work tomorrowe and I'm suffering frmo the old jet lag a bit, so I'm gonna take it easy now, I might have another can as a little night cap.
I remember Mr C suggesting we have a party to help celebrate the 2000 mark, way back when the 1000 hits party was cancelled, due to the fact the my good friend Dave the roofer had informerd me that he's bedded my recently ex'd Gill. I was so upset that I cancelled the party.
Who would have thought that only four months later, I'd be sitting so pretty? Sure, Gill left me and is now expecting Dave the roofers' baby, sure Dave the roofer is off to Canada, but I've got a new job, a brilliant new boss, the blog follower ship has grown from 13 to a whopping 26 (actually, it's been at 26 a while now, I think I might have to go on a recruitment drive soon!!!!) and I've also got some regular comments, also with excellent blogs of their own: Mr London Street, Tennyson ee Hemingway, The Vegetable Assassin, Mess ( I love ya buddy) and Other Worldly one. Sorry if I missed ya.
Though, (and I don't mean any offence to you other fine and lobely commenters, my favourite commenter doens't even have a blog! Mr Coleaman. I know as a former retired teacher you'd probabably advise against having favourites, but I can't help it.
Dear readers, Mr C's got a dodgy ticker and is at the mercy of the NHS, he's got an op coming up and so rather than me suggesting we all have a party to celebrate a personal achievement of mine, why don't we have a virtual party to help Mr C celebrate whenever he's had his op?
It's be great. I'll set the party mood (probably won't have anything to oexciting like strippers or a bouncy castle, even though he'll have a new heart he'll probably be under doctors orders to take things easy, so we can get some gentle Paul Simon tracks (Mr C is a big Paul Simon fan) and maybe wath a movie (The Graduate is one of Mr C's favs, which is a little bit racy, and puts me in mind of my recent Stateside conquest!) and we can have a live comment section, where we all make virtual small talk via the commen section of that blog post at a spcified time.
Sounds awaesom and the least that I could do for sucha great guy.