Sunday, November 1, 2009

It's a funny old game

Apologies in advance Tennyson, I'm going to spend a fair bit of today's post talking about a soccerball match. I do feel a tad guilty, I know you don't much care for Association Rules Football, and you left such an AWESOME comment after last night's last post. But hey, you can't please all of the people all of the time, so I might as well please myself. As it were.

I was planning to give you a write up about last night's adventure, but my memory of the actual events is a little bit hazy, and one or two things happened that I'd rather not go into directly. Fortunately, I've just watched a footy match on TV that could easily serve as an analogy for my experience at last night's Halloween party with Dan, which in turn could end up serving as an analogy for my life.

I woke up this morning feeling dreadful. I had a stinking hangover and my body ached all over. I felt like curling up into a ball and crying. The only thing that I had to look forward to all day was watching my beloved Notts Forest on the box. I know all you non-footy lovers out there will think that there's too much soccer on TV. And, in a way, you'd be right. But it is a rare day indeed that I get to see Forest from the comfort of my sofa. It usually happens just about twice a year, much like something else highly pleasurable that seems to happen to me with the frequency of an equinox.

Forest were playing away from home and had travelled to play the much fancied Cardiff City. A team going through some sort of renaissance at the moment, after years feeling sorry for its self, out in the winderness, they could once again become a force to be reckoned with, a good deal of investment has been made in the club and it seems to be going from strength to strength.

All the talk before the game was about how impressive Cardiff are, leaving Forest as an admired but unfancied underdog whose past glories are but a distant memory. The game started at quite a pace, the wet conditions adding to the zip of the ball. For all the pre-game chatter, Forest were holding the ball up well, they seemed to command the lion's share of possession. It was, however, Cardiff who looked the more likely to score. They looked powerful up front, they knew where the goal was. Forest were tight at the back, but lacked any kind of penetration.

At the midway stage, it was honours even. Neither side had scored. The pundits' view was that Forest had played the better game. They were unlucky not to have been awarded a penalty kick, sometimes when you're playing away from home, you don't get those close decisions.

The second half continued in much the same vein. The visitors were clearly on top. For some reason though, the Forest management decided that they needed to up the ante. They were on top and now it was time to go for the kill. Up until this point they'd been playing with an additional man in the middle, bossing the centre of the park. The manager withdrew the tricky attacking midfielder and brought on menacing target man.

With more space created in the middle of the park, it was Cardiff and not Forest who seized the advantage. Sweeping up field majestically the forwards combined to score a classic goal on the counter attack.

Cardiff were full of pomp, the home crowd in lusty voice were singing them on. They were ahead by a goal and threatening to score more with heir tails well and truly up. But Forest did not capitulate, true there were a couple of shaky moments, but the man in charge altered the tactics accordingly. They got back to doing what they do well. They were knocking it about, tidy little interchanges. It was impressive stuff, but they could well have been just flattering to deceive.

Then it happened. All good things come to he who waits. A fresh pair of legs came on up front, the ball bounced in front of the home team's goal, there was a fortunate bobble and handy deflection, and the visitors struck. That's all it took. It was half a chance really, in the dying seconds of the game. We'd already player over the allotted time and were running on pure fumes. GOAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Newsdesk, you beauty, I didn't need asking twice I can tell you that for nothing. There were a tense few moments before the final whistle, but I hung on, like Forest, and secured the result. I went home happy. I would have taken that result before the game. But in the cold light of day, when we look at the league table, Dan is still riding high, heading for automatic promotion. All I can realistically hope for is a place in the play-offs.

I have no idea what her name was, but I do remember her telling me that, anatomically, a woman's mouth is identical to a man's.

It's a funny old game.

Right, I've got to go now and watch the X-Factor results. Now my sweepstake band Miss Frank have left the competition. I have decided to support John & Edward. I feel they're the only act that I can empathize with.

Laters potaters!

Barry (the fox in the box) Newsdesk


  1. I've got a bad feeling about this Barry.

  2. Hi Blogleader,
    Like Mr L.S above, I'm getting a clenched, cross my legs moment here! You know what you are like with a few Cobras inside you! Has history taught you nothing, young man?

    "It's a funny old game."
    "A guy fondles it, man"

    I await with some foreboding the next few blogs as your memories of the party slowly and painfully return. Let's just hope no mobile phone photos make it onto Facebook to speed up your recall of the night!

    "Insanity in individuals is something rare - but in groups and parties it is the rule." -Friedrich Nietzsche, philosopher (1844-1900)

  3. Yes I concur with above commenters. We need the full story though Baz, that's the tricky part of journalism. Even if you don't want to, the story must be told. And I do love a team that are a bit tight in the back.

  4. You've got your blogfans worried now. O Barry where art thou?